hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You called yourself Captain Aspirin and then tried to cure my headache by shoving pills up my nose. Fuck you becoming a nurse, you can't take care of me while you're drunk ever again. Ever.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
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