the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
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