So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
there is glitter all over my balls
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