Swine flu is the new snow day.
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
Randomize
