just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
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