I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
If I die, sorry about rent.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
Randomize
