I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
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