is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
