Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
My mom just told me that the key to a successful marriage is never seeing your partner take a shit.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... π―πππ
Do I even want to know?
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
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