Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
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