I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
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