Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
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