Its about making memories worth repressing
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
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