so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
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Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
See, the Lortab wasn't working enough, so I thought "hey, vodka can speed that up! That's how science works!" Which probably should've been my indication that the Lortab was in fact working
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
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