Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
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