return my video game
I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??