Nicole vs. Life
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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