And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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