Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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