Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
Operation Purity has been aborted
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
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