We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
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