Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
Randomize
