Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
