Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
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He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
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