So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
Randomize