I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
Just took my morning after pill in the library
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
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Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
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