And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
Randomize
