My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
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Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
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Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
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