Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
Randomize