You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
