I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
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