We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize
