you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
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