it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Randomize
