She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Randomize
