I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
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