Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
Randomize
