Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Dude I left his house at 5:30 a.m. after you peed on his front door and then tried to fight me for my blanket. Don't even do that at my house or I will end you.
hahahahaha. Worst. Text. Ever.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
Randomize