This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Randomize