i just walked in on my sister drunkenly sobbing to sarah mclachlan. its time for an intervention.
didn't that happen to you last weekend?
shut up.
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
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