It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
Randomize
