what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
Randomize
