No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Randomize
