remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize
