how can u be prego again
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
Randomize
