I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize