This girl is more easily done than said...
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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