Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
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