why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
Randomize
