Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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