People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came.
he what???
Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
Randomize