don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
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